The next morning, a few members of the group departed for Port Antigone to see if they could bring back help. It turns out there's a quicker way to the shelter from where we saw the overturned car- by sea. It was a fisherman's town, perhaps the only one left since the outbreak. The open water was a dangerous place since contact with it was the first cause of zombification, but the people of Port Antigone continued to regularly sail fishing boats, now in search of resources and stragglers rather than edible products of the sea. No one really knows if eating a fish or a crab would infect someone- no one tried.
The port was on the coast of a large island, and the majority of its survivors were indigenous. They were able to support themselves with the resources they found on sailing trips along the state, as well as weaponry they'd stolen from the evacuated military base on the opposite side of the island, which is where the bridge to cross over by foot was.
I learned all of this with my eyes still shut.
Despite all this knowledge I'd picked up from a conversation passed over my paralyzed body, I had no idea where I was now or how I got there. Eva and the doctor of Port Antigone had been discussing the history of his resilient town which chose to remain by the water despite its potential hazards. I heard everything they said, but I could not respond. I could barely breathe.
Eva pressed something cool up to my lips. It was water. I allowed it to trickle into my mouth, and then I coughed back to life.
My eyes opened. We were in a strange room, with windows placed only at the top edges of the walls. It was daytime, but I could not see much else outside other than the sky. The storm had cleared the sky back to its blue brilliance,
I slowly tilted my head, gazing upon Eva. She was standing between me and another table with cloth draped over the wood. After inspecting a moment longer, I could see beyond Eva that Augustus was sitting with his back to mine, moaning as the doctor stitched up his arm. I'd been wondering where that occasional pig squeal was coming from.
"Doctor Veras, he's awake!" She smiled nervously. The doctor had a look at me. He wore a grave frown.
"How do you feel, son?"
It was a difficult question. The truth was, I did not feel. I did not feel anything at all. "Okay," I lied.
"You must have been out cold. You did not flinch at all when I sewed up your neck." Just as he finished speaking, Augustus let out another sharp yelp.
Another man I did not recognize entered through a door at the other end of the small room. "We're near the shore, Doc." He wore the hat of a captain.
"Stop the ship, We're not ready to dock."
The captain now bore a concerned expression. "Is everything alright?"
"Yes. We just need to have these two young men back on their feet." He stared at me again, and if I was capable of feeling panic, this is where it would have kicked in. "Can you stand, my boy?"
I could stand, although I shouldn't have been able to. It was such an unusual state, not feeling anything. I was tired, practically drained of energy. Yet my body felt light as air. The ground below me felt like clouds.
Eva tried to help me walk but the doctor stopped her. "He can do it. Come, follow us up to the deck."
The sun was so bright I couldn't see at first. Even when my eyes adjusted, everything still seemed blurry because of the intense light. The boat we were on was large, meant for many passengers. I peered over the edge as we came up the first set of stares. The waters were dark turquoise and churning pale as the vessel pushed through. Slowly the chaotic garble of white water ceased.
I heard a loud gunshot.
Eva screamed. I looked at her, but she was just gaping at me- the only pain she showed was in her face.
"Why did you shoot him?!"
I'd been shot? I assumed she was talking about me. A couple other recruiters came to gather around me. I stared down at my body to check for wounds, and finally noticed the deep gash in my chest dripping with fresh blood.
"He's infected," the doctor said plainly.
"We've all been vaccinated!" Augustus argued on my behalf, "we can't be infected, he's just recovering like me!"
"Look at him!" the doctor spat impatiently, "he didn't even know where he was shot!"
The truth in that was undeniable, and everyone was staring at me now. It wasn't enough, but I'd given some time to consider the outcome of all this... lying. The secret was out now.
The blood began to trickle on to the wooden deck. My mind felt void of choices on what to do next, but when I heard the captain say, "you ought to finish him off before he gets hungry," I didn't think twice to throw myself backwards, tumbling over the gate and splashing down into the water.
I could still see the boat above the surface, peering through a blue and red mosaic of ocean and blood. A couple heads peered over the edge to watch me sink deeper...
There was some sadness as I contemplated,
the end of my time on this world
the faces of my parents
I cried...
Oh, if only I knew that death would have been much easier that what I had in store for me... (reader, how do you think this journal was finished anyways? Certainly not by a corpse underwater...)
My sobbing caused me to innately take a deep breath, but I knew if could not hurt me anymore than I was already damned. Somehow, taking all the liquid in through my lungs felt reviving! I was slowly able to feel again, and yet I did not feel the pain of the bullet in my chest.
Then I heard a voice calling out to me.
"Who are you?"
I looked around, but all was dark.
Finally my eyes began to adjust, and I could see clearly, a jaded figure swimming towards me.
I wasn't sure how to answer. What good would my name do? Jace Orion was a dead man. The figure, although he appeared with human features, seemed supernatural. His eyes glowed and his skin was smooth and amphibious.
His presence did not strike me as fearful, but I remained on guard as he swam around me a few times contemplatively. "Are you an adult..." two swirls, three swirls, "...or are you a child?"
"I'm not sure how old I am."
"How old you are plays no role to that matter," he told me instructively, "are you an adult, or a child?"
I considered the strange question, nearly stranger than the appearance of this mysterious man himself. "I'm not an adult, but I'm not a child."
"Then you are neither."
With a whimsical gesture, he created a current inside the sea that sunk us deeper under the layers of water. I could no longer see the faint light of the surface.
"What is neither?" I asked.
"Neither is anything but, but a bit of both!" he sang, pleased with himself.
He motioned again, and again we sunk.
He placed his hand under my chin, observing my gaze like a scientist. "Neither," he addressed me, "would you like to live with me and the children?"
I didn't, and that was mostly because I did not have a clue what a creepy statement like that could possibly mean. But I was even more afraid of how he might react if I refused.
"Perhaps," I said softly.
Suddenly I felt dozens of trembling fingers touching my skin. Little hands surrounded my ankles, drawing me down to the sea floor. A few fish swam around their small, docile bodies.
They were children.
Real, human children... living at the bottom of the ocean. They wore empty grins.
The man floated behind them and petted their backs kindly. Upon each touch they seemed to tense up and vibrate, a behavior which resembled a muted giggle. "They don't think or do much, but they are happy- this I am certain of. Soon you will be happy too."
The fear started to set in. I shook my head, "No.... no... I can't become like this."
The man frowned. "Well... I assume you want to walk on the shore again."
I did, but I assumed two things; I felt fine now, but I still carried the infection. If I went back to land I would probably still turn. And the second matter was that this man carried a great pride for where he was living. Stating that I wished to leave would be offensive, and whether it was true or not, it wouldn't help to share it with him.
"Not the shore," I explained, "I suppose my time on land is done. But these children... they're mindless... meaningless! As long as I'm still alive, my life has to mean something. I can't just be happy without reason."
He nodded as I spoke, understanding gradually. "That is noble," he claimed. "Unfortunately, my dear friend Neither, you have adult aspiration in a child's body. I have not encountered one like you before, but you are still human. You must choose an element. Be pacified by my waters... or be maddened by the air."
It was the final option, I realized.
I chose peace.
The man's name is Naceo. and he claims he is the god of the sea. I have no reason not to believe him. He's many centuries old, but stuck at seventeen. That was when he left the Havens to live out the rest of his days in his own creation- to be alone and far from home.
Naceo respected me for reminding him of himself, so he passively allowed me to roam from his den at the ocean floor. Occasionally I would journey to the surface and look around at the world I left behind. At first it was a way of keeping time- knowing how many days and nights had passed through the cycles of blue and black skies- but then I realized that balancing myself between the above sea and below was keeping me sane. I never seemed to fade away into the mindless bliss that Naceo warned me of.
He noticed this too.
"You leave often, Neither," he mentioned one day while combing his fingers through the hair of a young girl as if she were a doll.
I was accustomed to the god's strange but peaceful nature by now. His actions worried me less than his question: "Where do you go?"
I was honest, and I admitted that I had not quite chosen between air and water. "It's kept me well," I tried on a smile, "and I'm considering... going up... just for a day... to write a letter that I hope will reach my parents."
Naceo was nodding, but he looked quite bitter. "Your parents? Figures... you're a child."
"A part of maturity is loving your parents," I stood my ground, knowing Naceo would prefer me to speak my mind rather than accept his insult. But I recalled his history and reasoning for leaving Haven. This concept he did not comprehend- or refused to.
"Well Neither... you may do as you please. You've spent a good time down here with me, and it has not satisfied you. You must own the judgement on which life you want."
"I'll be back soon," I confirmed, "it's only for a day."
I pushed off the bottom.
"Do not break your promise!" he scowled, suddenly turning grim. "You humans are good at breaking promises."
I wasn't sure what he meant, but I took it as permission to begin my adventure up.
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